Re: A new post in a long long time

It has been a long time ago that I last updated this blog, and there have been some important changes in my life. In this post I introduce them all and, erm, promise to write more.

First off, I have come back home from Japan and thus my blog needed changes in the title and the subtitle. Which I made today. The new title is, I have to admit, the first thing that came to me, and I let it hang there until I find something better. I also changed the theme, as my not-so-numerous readers might notice. This new theme is somewhat too clunky with its big font size and a little clumsy-looking in my eyes with its right-hand alignment and the tags on the top, but at the moment I don't really care about being neat and clean. This change is good, for a change.

Secondly, I became a father last November (the same month I came back from Japan) and my life now is a whole lot more different than it used to be. If you have a kid you might understand me without any further ado, but even if you don't, I can't make my feelings clearer because it is so WOW!

Finally, I have a full-time job now (at the same place I used to work before I went to Japan and when I was writing this blog) and I am quite excited about it. It's full of interesting challenges and I can't wait to see the first results of my work in the next several months. I won't be talking here more about my job, though.

The art of fitting in.

For some time in the last few months I have tried to suppress my surprise at what I see as the grand paradox of the Japanese society - how such an advanced society could have been built on the shoulders of people with such a limited personal outlook at the world. This country is filled with people who always live by the rules, who cannot even imagine that there might be another way to do something. I know I am indulging myself in one of the most terrible generalisations, but this is what I feel after almost three months of living here. This is a society of taboos - and breaking them is tantamount to social suicide. What is most important here is to fit in, not stand out.

People here are so much afraid of taking responsibility, of standing up and facing the music, to borrow the words of one marvellous speaker (and tango dancer, how could I forget?) Liet. Col. Frank Slade. If you plan to visit your local bank with a question that is not on the day-to-day FAQ list of an average cashier, and, to make the matters worse, your Japanese does not go far beyond “Hello!” and “Nice weather!”, then be prepared to be sent somewhere else to call some number. Which is usually answered, after a few minutes of standing in the queue and listening to stupid phone music, by a Japanese female with a geisha voice and an American accent, to whom you will have to explain everything from the very beginning. And no wonder if at the very end of your long conversation she redirects you somewhere else. Simple things that usually take no time at all are turned into long and tiresome procedures here. Everyday, whereever you go, you face - you feel the walls around you, and sometimes they close in on you. This is where little frustrations start to build one upon another, slowly, day by day. It is very important not to lose your temper in this country - the Japanese themselves always somehow manage to do this.

I more often than ever feel myself a round peg in a square hole here. I haven’t gone so far as to regret my decision to come here, no, but there surely have been some hard times during which I felt short of swearwords. Maybe I should learn Zen or to meditate - maybe the ancient art of healing - acupuncture - will soothe my nerves?